In the case of Doe v Roe [2021] NZHC 3162, a story unfolds that serves as a powerful reminder of the impact parental conflict and excessive litigation can have on children. The names in this case have been altered to protect privacy, but the lessons are all too real. This a public case law in the High Court – there are no restriction on publishing the story of this case.
Background
Alan Doe and Grace Roe married in 2004 and separated in 2012. They had two children: Emily, born in 2007, and her older brother. Initially, the parents agreed on a shared care arrangement. However, the road ahead proved to be rocky.
Procedural History
- May 2015: Alan sought a parenting order through the Family Court.
- January 2017: A final parenting order was made, providing for shared care on a week-on/week-off basis.
- June 2017: Grace sought a warrant to enforce the parenting order for Emily’s brother.
- November 2020: A warrant was issued to enforce the parenting order for Emily.
- December 2020: Grace applied to vary the parenting order, and Alan applied to suspend both the order and the warrant.
Family Court Proceedings
In March 2021, Judge Walker reviewed the situation and reinstated the shared care arrangement but temporarily suspended the parenting order to allow Emily to rebuild her relationship with her mother.
Appeal
Alan appealed Judge Walker’s decision, aiming to have his application to suspend the parenting order granted. Both parties provided updated affidavits and were cross-examined.
Key Issues
- Parental Conflict: The ongoing disputes and contradictory views between the parents had a significant impact on Emily. She was often caught in the crossfire, which affected her emotional well-being.
- Therapy for Emily: Emily was referred to Dr. Olivia Brown, a clinical psychologist, to help her navigate the emotional turmoil stemming from the prolonged conflict.
- Psychological Reports: Several reports provided context but were more focused on Emily’s brother.
Court’s Findings
The court acknowledged the severe emotional toll on Emily, who had been subjected to constant litigation and conflict since she was seven years old. The emphasis was placed on the necessity of therapy and a stable environment for her well-being.
Impact on Emily
- Emotional and Psychological Effects: Emily faced significant distress due to the ongoing legal battles. The constant conflict led to emotional issues, including self-harm as a coping mechanism.
- Behavioural Changes: Emily’s reluctance to visit her mother and the strained relationship with both parents were notable. The conflict also led to a temporary suspension of the shared care arrangement to help her reconnect with her mother.
Therapy and Support
- Therapy with Dr. Brown: Emily engaged in therapy sessions with Dr. Olivia Brown, finding them helpful in managing her trauma and emotional distress. By the time of the appeal, Emily had attended sixteen sessions and built a positive rapport with Dr. Brown.
Court’s Observations
The court recognised the detrimental effect of the ongoing parental conflict on Emily’s mental health. It was clear that stability and appropriate psychological support were crucial to mitigating the adverse effects of the disputes.
Summary
Emily’s experience highlights the profound impact that prolonged legal battles and parental conflict can have on a child. Her reluctance to visit her mother, preference for staying with her father, and self-harm behaviours were clear indicators of the emotional strain she endured. The involvement of a clinical psychologist was vital in helping her cope, underscoring the importance of providing children with the necessary psychological support during such tumultuous times.
For separated parents, this case is a reminder of the importance of managing conflict and litigation carefully. The well-being of your children should always be a priority, and it’s crucial to consider how your actions and decisions may affect them. Litigation inflame conflicts – sometimes litigation is needed.
Zayne Jouma is the founder and Chairman of FDSS. He is a self-taught, trained, and experienced Mediator, Conflict Coach, Court lay-assistant/ McKenzie Friend & Community coach. Zayne has helped many parents through mediation and conflict resolution and has assisted hundreds of Self-represented parents in their Family Court & High Court cases across New Zealand.
